Just Let Me Go
by A Dark Angel's Melody
Summary: The pain, the tears, the flowing blood. This is no new routine... not for a self-harmer like Mitchie Torres. Can she hide the scars from everyone? More importantly, will she ever get better?
1. Chapter 1

**Mitchie's POV**

I had finally finished packing my stuff. I was going to Camp Rock in the morning; I wondered what everyone would think of me. I'd dyed my stringy brown hair raven black; my style was very hardcore, I now wore what "emos" wore. I hated it that people used the word "emo" so freely. It wasn't _even _a word. But I'd been called an emo freak before; I should be used to that word. I just didn't know if I would be accepted like I had been before. I ignored that nagging thought as I picked up my lyric book. It was black with a broken heart design on it. I never used my old yellow song book. It seemed way too girly and innocent, not to mention… it looked **cheerful**. I was _not _cheerful.

I opened it as if I could break it easily, so I was quite cautious. I loved rereading the lyrics I had written, no matter now long ago the lyrics were penned:

_I've been crashing to the ground  
Everything is wrong  
A moment of peace is all that I want  
But these memories are a current  
They pull me under_

_Everything is wrong  
A moment of peace is all that I want_

_It's not as simple as I wish it could be  
It's not the same as yesterday  
If you knew what I was feeling now  
Maybe you'd care_

I remembered writing that. It was the saddest moment of my life. No one cared. It didn't matter if they even knew what was going on. No one even knew what had been going on with me. Sorry, I really don't feel like talking about this. No one needs to know what happened that night. I slowly closed the book. I reopened it at the very front page. A razor blade fell onto my bed; I didn't want anyone to find it, but I had to bring it to camp. So I had hidden it carefully. I wasn't waiting until tomorrow to feel alive though; I picked up the shining silver blade. I loved it like it was my best friend and I hated it like it was my worst enemy. I never thought I would have such feelings of hatred for an object. But I do. I love it though. I have a love/hate relationship with an object. I rolled my eyes at the realization of just how crazy my thoughts were.

I glided the silver blade along my wrist.

I watched as a little bit of blood creeped up out of the broken part of the skin. It came out slowly. It barely bled more than a drop.

The sting came. It wasn't the pain that I had hoped for. I cut it more violently, knowing that it would help me to feel something. After all, it's better to hurt than to feel nothing at all. Then that's the exact moment when the blood began to stain my pale wrist ruby.

My wrist began to sting again. The sting I had now was sufficient, I smirked, knowing that I was getting my way; I was in control for once in my life. I realized that I was bleeding out so quickly that blood was pouring out onto my hand. I quickly walked into my bathroom to sit on the floor and let the blood drip off my hand and onto the tile floor. Later I would erase all evidence that this ever happened. I needed to keep this a secret for as long as possible.

Tears pooled in my eyes as I felt overwhelmed with pain and relief. I was only relieved because I knew I was alive. Just knowing that I was breathing after going hours without even believing I was really here was overwhelming. The pain only existed now. I felt nothing when I was cutting. I was completely disassociated. I hated crying. It made me feel weak.

I reminded myself that I was weak every single day. I never believed it. The scars on my wrist showed the battles that I had been in. I won them all, there's a scar for each on of them. But as I cry, all I can think about is the one question I'd never thought about: _How am I supposed to hide the scars? _

It may seem like an obvious thing. But this was _summer _camp. And on top of that, I would be sharing a cabin with other girls. I let the thought leave my mind. I didn't want it there. Besides, I've gotten into some crazy situations. Everything's turned out right, so I switched my focus to the slowing blood flow. I sighed as I noticed that this looked a lot like the girl that I promised I would never become. I lied.

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**A/N: Please let me know if you like it or not. It would mean a lot to me. **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I'm glad people have been reading my story, but I only have one review. Will you help that number go up? I'd love you forever! Anyway, here's the story…**

**Mitchie's POV**

I got up and turned off my stupid alarm clock. God, I hated waking up to that thing. But I really had no choice in the matter. The first thing I did was put concealer on my wrist. It would get infected. At this point, that was the least of my worries. I'd rather not hurt my chances of being liked and accepted. I felt that was more important than my mental health. Well, it _is _more important. My mental health meant nothing. If no one else cared, why should I? I knew that question had an obvious answer. There was no reason that I should care; I went along with my morning after mentally scolding myself for having a mental debate. I pulled on a pair of black skinny jeans. Then I but on a bright red shirt with the outline of a broken heart that was black. It was super tight. I felt fat. I'd always felt fat though, it was today that I decided to do something about it. I would stop eating. How bad could it get? I didn't get why people told me that they wished they were as thin as I was. They were crazy. Majorly crazy. Gosh, crazy was only the beginning. I promised myself I wouldn't eat breakfast that morning. My stomach begged for food. I wanted it to hush up. I ignored it while I brushed my hair. It was wavy. That just _had _to be fixed. I plugged in my straightening iron.

While waiting for it to heat up, I did my makeup. I put on hot pink eye shadow. Then I applied eye liner all around my eyes. I went over it five times. One more time than what was recommended for "emos"; I didn't care. I put on mascara after that. My eyes looked perfect; then I put on pale pink lip gloss. It made my pale face look more like I wanted to be "emo" than anything. I put my makeup into my makeup bag. I picked up my straightening iron. I fixed the waviness in my hair section by section until it was almost completely straight, with a few waves that I had purposely left out. I turned off my straightening iron and unplugged it. I put it among my other stuff in my suitcase. I was quite nervous. My friends could easily turn on me and call me an emo freak or something.

I walked downstairs carrying my suitcase. My mom seemed to be looking at me disapprovingly. But as usual, she didn't say anything. "You look nice… are you going to eat something?" My mom asked, she sounded concerned, but couldn't she see that I was fat!? I gave her a small smile.

"No. It's okay. I'll be fine." I told her reassuringly. After looking me over carefully, I think she let it go. I was used to this. I was always told that I should eat, wear less makeup, and smile more often, but I reject the offer, as I didn't really need the advice I was being given. I was fat, my makeup was fine, and what the heck did I have to smile about?

I put my suitcase and duffel bag into my mom's van. I wasn't really looking forward to the two hour car ride with my mother. We didn't have much of a relationship. Our relationship was simply her trying to please me and give me my space; I did the same for her. "Mitchie, you really should eat." My mother told me.

I rolled my eyes.

"Mommy… I'm not going to eat. Sorry if you wanted me to get fat. But that's not what I want." I said sweetly. I knew that I would get my way if I said that. That was the only reason I chose the words that I did. My mom didn't say anything else. All she did was get into the van with me. I hoped this car ride would stay silent. I didn't want to say anything; I was sick of communicating with people that never listened. It never worked. I hated feeling the way I did. It would never change. The pain I was in began to force memories upon me. Final Jam last summer… that canoe ride with Shane… Tess revealing my lie…

Why was Shane in each of those memories?

That really made me think… Shane was the one I bonded most with. I still had his number,

I never called. But Shane promised me that he would be at Camp Rock. I felt like he'd hate the new look. He liked the shy, innocent, and happy Mitchie Torres. That girl didn't exist any longer. I hated disappointing people. I knew I would; I have always hated myself for that. Instead of being mad at myself, I fell asleep within five minutes. Being awake at 6:30am was _so _not cool. Even with my consciousness slowly slipping away, I could feel that my mother was mentally making a fuss over me; she really thought that my makeup was too dark and that I was one of those bad teenagers. I wanted to scream at her for believing that. But I simply continued to drift into sleep. Sleep took over my entire body. It lasted for as long as the car ride. "We're here!" The voice of my mother woke me up. But that wasn't a bad way to wake up. It wasn't like the sound of an alarm clock or anything. I opened my sleepy eyes. I could see other campers arriving. I didn't recognize most of them. But I didn't care; I should probably meet new people anyway. "Mitch, you can go look for your friends, I'll bring your bags to your cabin." She seemed to think that suddenly I would feel 10 times better after she told me this.

"Thanks Mother," I said properly. I didn't sound sarcastic or anything. Anyway, I promptly hopped out of the van. I didn't really recognize anyone. But someone seemed to recognize me…

"Mitchie?" I turned to see Caitlyn. She still had her crazy and creative style. Her hair was straightened and she had blond highlights, but other than that, she looked the same. "Wow… this look is definitely different." Caitlyn said unsurely.

I didn't know how to respond at first. Caitlyn was my best friend. Well, her and Sierra. "You don't like it do you?" I smirked.

I personally didn't mind if Caitlyn didn't like my look.

"Mitch, I _love _it. But since when was this your style?" Caitlyn asked curiously.

I was thinking about whether or not she seemed suspicious. But I decided that _I _was the one being suspicious. I bit my lip. "Since September 25th." I said nonchalantly. "But Cait, where's my hug?" I asked cheerfully. Caitlyn hugged me. I hugged back.

I sighed in contentment. I thought that Caitlyn would just drop the subject, and she did, "So Mitchie… what have you been up to?"

It was obvious that she was trying to make up for the slightly awkward reintroduction.

"Not much. Songwriting mostly." I told her, "What about you?" Caitlyn shrugged. Nothing was ever a big deal to Caitlyn, that's the way she seemed to view things.

"I haven't done much. Oh, but I actually passed 9th grade!" Caitlyn smiled. It was not a secret that Caitlyn's grades could improve. But she actually tried, she was not a slacker. Usually Caitlyn tried really hard. And this time, things fell into place.

"Even Algebra?" I raised an eye brow. Laughing, Caitlyn nodded.

"Well, I wouldn't have done it without a tutor. But I passed. With a B+!" I squealed with Caitlyn. No, I didn't like Algebra either. But knowing that Caitlyn had brought her grade up from an F… well, it made me happy for her. My grades were barely passing grades except for in Honors English, where I excelled. I didn't know care much about school. But that wasn't the point…

Anyway, about five minutes later, Caitlyn and I went to our cabin, because apparently we were assigned to the same one. Tess was also assigned to this cabin.

My mom had put my stuff in here by my bed. And Caitlyn had already put her stuff in the room. Tess was putting posters on the wall. I didn't know that one girl could have so many posters.

"Hey guys," Tess greeted us cheerfully. I smiled slightly, knowing Tess had really changed from the person she was last summer.

"Hey Tess," I said. She finished putting up the poster of Paramore before turning to look at me. She looked quite stunned.

"Whoa! Mitchie… you look awesome, I like the hardcore look for you." Tess told me while looking me over. "And Caitlyn, you look beautiful. I love the new hairstyle." I looked at Tess. She was still a little overdressed for camp. I didn't understand that. But she had darkened her light blonde hair a bit. She had also curled it that day. It looked really good on her. I glanced at my wrist to see if the makeup was wearing off before continuing the conversation. (Luckily for me, it wasn't wearing off.)

"Thanks, I love _your _new hairstyle." I told her.

"I do too. I dyed it last week."

Well, since you probably don't care about 3 girls talking about hair, let me skip to what happened later that day…

I was walking to nowhere in particular.

I bumped into someone because I was completely unfocused on everything around me. "Sorry!" I said quickly.

"It's okay, I'm-" That's the moment we looked into each other's eyes. "Mitchie?" He asked in disbelief. At least I was _somewhat _recognizable.

"Oh my gosh, Shane, I… I… I _really_ missed you." I managed to get out.

"Aww, I've missed you too Mitch. A lot." He gently pulled me into a hug. It felt so good that I couldn't help but hold him tighter. The feeling I had was impossible to explain.

When we let go of each other, I bit my lip and blushed.

"I guess I was a little busy with school and you were busy touring the world. We never actually talked to each other." I giggled slightly, trying to convince him that there was nothing wrong. I didn't want him to worry about me. Shane gave me a half hearted smile. It was obvious that he wanted to communicate with me this whole time.

"Mitchie, that's never going to happen again, I promise. But I'm curious… when did you start dressing like a rebel? It's the last thing I'd ever expect you to become." Shane was completely honest with me. I liked that. And at least he never said that he _didn't _like my new style. So I couldn't take offense.

"In September, not long after camp."

"You look good. I like it. It's just so unlike you."

**A/N: So I have one question, and this won't happen for a while, but do you think Mitchie should tell someone that she cuts or should someone find out?**

**Who does she tell?/Who finds out?**


	3. Chapter 3

**Caitlyn's POV**

I was on my laptop (as usual), while listening to Mitchie write a song, she always seemed to write the most heartbreaking things, this time was no exeption. Her guitar was playing a sweet and inviting melody.

Mitchie started to sing:

"_Little girl terrified  
She'd leave her room if only bruises would heal  
A home is no place to hide  
Her heart is breaking from the pain that she feels_  
_She'll be just fine, cause now he hears her when she cries  
She'll be just fine, cause now he hears her when she cries"_

_Every day's the same  
She fights to find her way  
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray  
She wonders why, does anyone ever hear her when she cries_

_Today she's turning sixteen  
Everyone singing, but she can't seem to smile  
They never get past arms length  
How could they act like everything is alright?  
She's pulling down her long sleeves  
To cover all the memories that scars leave  
She says: "Maybe making me bleed  
Will be the answer that could wash the slate clean"_

_Every day's the same  
She fights to find her way  
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray  
She wonders why, does anyone ever hear her when she cries_

_This is the dark before the dawn  
The storm before the peace  
Don't be afraid 'cause seasons change and  
God is watching over you  
He hears you_

_Every day's the same  
She fights to find her way  
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray  
She'll be just fine, cause now he hears her when she cries_

_Every day's the same  
She fights to find her way  
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray  
She'll be just fine, cause now he hears her when she cries'_

I turned to Mitchie. How was it that her songs were always so effective? I knew that Mitchie was very talented

"Mitchie, that was amazing!"

"Thanks."

"Mitchie, what's wrong?" I asked, knowing that Mitchie wasn't her usual perky self. She was acting extremely clammy lately. A question wouldn't cause her to open up. I wanted to beg her to tell me what was going on with her. But I shrugged it off. It was probably that she had written that song about someone. That was honestly a hard subject to discuss. Self-harming was sad. It was something that not enough people spoke out about. But Mitchie looked away. She appeared to be wiping a tear out of her eye. I wanted to hug her and tell her that everything would be okay, but I had no idea if that was the wrong thing to do. Most everything I did and said was wrong. And Mitchie looked so sad that I couldn't help but want to help her. I hate the feeling of not knowing what to say or do; I'm so nervous every time I get thrown into a situation like this, I could tell that my best friend was gone, this wasn't the Mitchie I knew and loved. She would never be the same. I just wish I knew why, "Please answer me; is there anything wrong?"

"No. I'm fine." Mitchie sounded convincing; I nodded and Mitchie looked relieved. I believed her. I didn't say anything. What could I say? "But thanks for asking about me." Mitchie added. I smiled slightly before looking at my clock. _4:45. _Mitchie and I were doing a performance for the whole 'Welcome Jam' thing. There were so many jams that it was hard to keep them straight.

That particular jam happened to be at 7 that night. Tess was performing too, but she was out practicing at the piano. I found that interesting. Tess never practiced at the piano; I didn't even know she played the piano. I was happy that she was dropping the whole 'pop princess' act.

Mitchie carefully put her song book in her bag and took her bag with her into the bathroom. She was the only one who hadn't unpacked yet. I didn't think much of it. It wasn't suspicious or anything. Why should I think about it?

When she came out about 10 minutes later, she had several bracelets on her left wrist. I didn't think much of it. Mitchie put her bag on the floor and moved her guitar out of the way before falling onto her bed. She closed her eyes. I sighed.

After checking my email I looked over at Mitchie. She was obviously asleep. I closed my laptop and turned it off. I decided to leave the cabin to wander around aimlessly. That seemed interesting, well not really, but it was more exciting than everything going on in here. I put on my white flip-flops and walked out the door; leaving Mitchie alone. She didn't wake up by the sound of me walking around. I closed the door behind me. I walked around a little bit. I just happened to meet up with Shane.

He looked at me as if he were debating whether or not to start a conversation with me, but instead, I just said about the stupidest thing I could possibly say:

"Mitchie hasn't talked about you all day, she hasn't even mentioned your name, and she also doesn't have a crush on you. She most definitely doesn't; she doesn't see you as anything more than a friend!"

"Okay…? I didn't ask about Mitchie, but thanks for giving me the update." Shane said sarcastically.

I shrugged as if to say 'No problem', he chuckled because he knew very well that I was crazy. I knew that Tess wasn't the only one who had completely changed since this time last year. "You're welcome." I added, matching Shane's sarcastic tone.

**A/N: I do not own the song, Britt Nicole does! (But I do own the song in the first chapter.)**

**Anyway, I have another question for you readers. Taking into account what you've read so far, do you think Mitchie has anorexia?**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: This chapter is dedicated to JBDreamer226. Why? Because she's awesome. How? It all started with her reviewing. Who? I think you should know that by now. Where? The internet. When? Yesterday when I told her I'd dedicate this chapter to her (and when I wrote this).**

**Anyway, since you already know that this chapter is dedicated to JBDreamer226 (I thought I'd mention it more than necessary), I'm going to ask you all to slap me for forgetting that I'm going to a concert tonight. A Martina McBride/Trace Adkins one… I don't know why I keep forgetting. Anyway remind me so that way I might actually have a chance at being ready on time.**

**Oh, in case you forgot, this chapter is dedicated to JBDreamer226.**

**Shane's POV**

"Are you sure Mitchie doesn't have a crush on me?" I asked Caitlyn suspiciously. She looked quickly to the side, trying to come up with a response on the spot.

"I don't know! Stop interrogating me!" I suddenly felt better, because I liked Mitchie, but that was no secret. Everyone knew that. Everyone but Mitchie at least. I just wished we were closer.

I smiled at Caitlyn. "Thanks, that's all I needed to know." She eyed me suspiciously. I didn't know what to tell her.

"What did you need to know that for? Wait, why am I even asking you this?" She asked. I chuckled slightly.

"Well, you should already know."

"I do."

"Promise me you won't tell Mitchie?"

"Okay, just tell her soon, I don't know how long I can keep this a secret." Caitlyn said. I knew that Mitchie liked me; it would be much easier to tell her now.

"Don't worry, I swear it won't be a long wait."

Caitlyn nodded.

* * *

It was cute to see Mitchie looking so nervous.

I wasn't quite sure why she was nervous though, she should know that she's amazing, I stared at Mitchie as she walked up the stairs in order to take the stage. She looked beautiful. "I'm Mitchie Torres in case you didn't know; and Caitlyn Gellar is the music producer, I hope you like the song we wrote." She said, breathing heavily. The music started. It sounded like a sad song, something that you would hear on the radio:

'_Do you love me?  
Did you love me when you left me all alone?  
I don't know  
I still don't  
When it's late at night, I wonder if you remember  
Though I won't mind if you don't  
If you don't remember, well, at least I won't have to wonder_

_I've been waiting here for hours  
I'm still hoping that you will call  
Because you can't be with me now  
I know I'll see you soon_

_Yes, I love you  
I loved you all along, though I never called  
I felt so shy  
I still do  
I can only hope that no one else will take my place  
I knew we can make this work  
I'll stop crying, I'm ready to get off of my weak knees_

_I've been waiting here for hours  
I'm still hoping that you will call  
Because you can't be with me now  
I know I'll see you soon_

_Do you love me?  
Did you love me when you left me all alone?  
I don't know_

_I was sitting there all day  
I kept praying that you would call  
And now that you're with me now  
Just promise you won't leave'_

I realized that Mitchie had written that about something she had gone through with me… because I felt the exact same way that Mitchie had been feeling.

Anyway, I felt unsure as Tess took the stage, but evidently she had given up the 'pop princess' act.

Tess was wearing a long dress that fit her curves perfectly but flowed out at the bottom, it was beautiful. Then seeing her sit at the piano was strange. I didn't even know that she could play the piano.

_And even though the moment passed me by  
I still can't turn away  
Cause all the dreams you never thought you'd lose  
Got tossed along the way  
And letters that you never meant to send  
Get lost or thrown away_

And now we're grown up orphans  
That never knew their names  
We don't belong to no one  
That's a shame  
But if you could hide beside me  
Maybe for a while  
And I won't tell no one your name

And I won't tell em your name

Scars are souvenirs you never lose  
The past is never far  
Did you lose yourself somewhere out there  
Did you get to be a star  
And don't it make you sad to know that life  
Is more than who we are

You grew up way too fast  
And now there's nothing to believe  
And reruns all become our history  
A tired song keeps playing on a tired radio  
And I won't tell no one your name  
And I won't tell em your name

I think about you all the time  
But I don't need the same  
It's lonely where you are come back down  
And I won't tell em your name

Everyone stood up to clap. Tess was so much different. That was good. I was happy about that. As Tess walked off stage, Mitchie and Caitlyn walked up to hug her. It was cool to see Caitlyn, Tess, and Mitchie being friends. It made me smile. But I'm usually a happy person. I waited until the commotion of the 'Welcome Jam' had died down. I needed to talk to Mitchie. I liked how we were the only two people there. "Mitch, do you want to go on a canoe ride?"

"Sure, that sounds great, I love going in circles." Mitchie smiled, okay, a lot of things about her had changed, but that big smile hadn't, that smile had made its way into my heart. I felt that Mitchie was contagious. When she was smiling, everyone else was as well.

"Hey, going in circles is awesome! It takes talent to operate a canoe wrong!" I told her defensively. Mitchie was laughing uncontrollably; she had the cutest laugh ever. I loved it. Mitchie and I walked over to where the canoes were.

I know how ugly Mitchie thought life vests were. She'd complained about it before, "I haven't gotten any better at canoeing since last summer; I never felt the urge to take lessons." Mitchie told me jokingly after putting her life vest on.

Mitchie and I got into one of the canoes, trying not to fall into the water. "Don't worry, I haven't taken canoeing lessons either, I didn't think out canoe rides would be the same if we knew how to do it." I told her. She shrugged. She looked quite nervous. I couldn't quite tell why.

But then I remembered the conversation that I had with Caitlyn earlier, and suddenly I was nervous too. "The sky is so beautiful and clear tonight. The stars are so bright and sparkly."

"There are so many of them, like more than ten." I said jokingly. Mitchie rolled her eyes and played along. She looked at me and nodded like she was in awe of my statement. Though we both knew that she really wasn't. She also knew that what I said was an understatement. It was so obvious. But we didn't care.

"No kidding. There's probably even more than twenty." Mitchie said, looking up slightly before catching my eye again. We both started laughing because our conversation was _so _not funny; we did that a lot last summer. Time hadn't really changed her. I knew that I couldn't keep waiting to talk to her about what was on my mind, I'd missed my chance so many times that I couldn't stand it anymore.

"Answer this honestly. What would you say if I told you that I love you?" I asked. Mitchie jerked up a little because the question was very unexpected, even I didn't expect it, I thought I would ask more indirectly.

"It depends on how you meant it." Mitchie simply stated. She sounded hopeful though, and I don't know why I was afraid of telling her how I meant it. I knew she liked me. I had no reason to fear.

"I mean it like… I love you, I love you as more than a friend, I have romantic feelings for you, and I'm really not asking how you would react… I'm waiting for you to react." I told her. She let it sink it. I could tell that this came as a bit of a shock to her.

"I really love you too. I can't believe that this is happening. It's just so… perfect. Wow… that was a lot easier than I thought it would be." I felt relieved, and I know Mitchie did too. She sighed in contentment.

I didn't know that starting a relationship was so complicated. "So… is this official?" I asked. Mitchie was playing with the ring on her finger and trying to avoid eye contact with me. I didn't mind that at all. Because I was too shy to look her in the eye.

"I don't know. Do you want it to be?" Mitchie asked. I didn't want to have to be put in this position. I really didn't want to be pushy, yet there was no way I could tell her that I didn't want this.

"Yes." I told her. Mitchie didn't seem surprised. But she was content, and in a good way. I didn't know if I should hug her or kiss her, I didn't know if either of these things were the right thing to do. I'd only been in 2 other relationships, and I didn't even care about what was the 'right thing'. I didn't even care about them for that matter. It was different with Mitchie.

"Then it's official." Mitchie said, and barely audible I could hear her say: "Finally."

**A/N: Just so you know, I only own Mitchie's song. Tess' song belongs to the Goo Goo Dolls.**

**And just in case you forgot, this chapter is dedicated to JBDreamer226. And you know what? It all started with a review… and now she can be like… "I have an entire chapter dedicated to ME and no one else! I rock!!!!"**

**Haha, anyway, did you like the chapter?**


	5. Chapter 5

**General POV**

Mitchie walked into her cabin, looking quite tired. Mitchie looked at Caitlyn and Tess while they were in their beds, thinking that they were asleep.

Mitchie walked into the bathroom quietly. She didn't really feel all that great. It wasn't really that she felt _bad,_ just a little bit guilty, which overall, doesn't leave a person with a great feeling.

"Okay…" Mitchie gently said to herself, trying to calm herself before cutting her wrist with the razor blade that she had just taken out of her song book. Letting the blade glide across her wrist, almost not realizing that she was the one doing it, Mitchie felt overwhelmed at the sight of her scar being cut open. She was feeling something. Finally.

The blood forced its way out of her open wound. It stung like crazy. But the cut wasn't deep. It usually was. But it didn't need to be deep this time. Mitchie teared up. But she wasn't about to cry. That was a sign of weakness. She did not want to cry. She was _not _weak.

Mitchie wouldn't let herself cry over Shane, yes, the two of them were dating now, and knowing that she had really spent that night with Shane was amazing… It was something that could easily make Mitchie weak. But the real reason she had cut herself tonight was because she hated being in a committed relationship and keeping secrets. She needed to feel a fraction of the pain that Shane would be feeling if he knew that she was hiding things from him.

Mitchie knew that Shane had to know sometime, she couldn't deny that simple fact. She simply ignored the thought. She changed into a pink tank top along with purple 'sleep pants' as she called them to make herself feel more comfortable before going to sleep.

Mitchie glanced down at her wrist; she was too tired to cover it up. She would much rather sleep. There might be a problem hiding it in the morning, but not enough of a problem to make Mitchie worry about it. She walked out of the bathroom, turning off the light quickly so the scars would barely be seen if they just happened to be glanced at.

Mitchie crawled into bed, thinking that she wouldn't have to hide it in the morning. She didn't care about how she was going to hide the scars and cuts anymore, she thought about Shane instead. Mitchie didn't know that Shane had loved her this whole time; it meant that they actually could have been dating for a year now, but Mitchie knew that she was very immature at age 14, she probably wasn't mature enough to carry on a relationship. Well, she was fifteen now, that wasn't a huge age difference, but she had definitely matured over the past year. She'd gone through so much in her short life, and now she was the girlfriend of a superstar. It was insane, but in a good way; Mitchie just couldn't keep her mind focused on Shane for very long. The only thing that kept crossing her mind after that was cutting. She was guilty because cutting seemed to be more important to her than Shane, though she well knew that it wasn't true at all. Mitchie wanted her mind to just let go of the thought of wrist cutting, it wasn't good for her to dwell on these gory thoughts. Thinking about bleeding all the time wasn't the best way to live. Mitchie started playing with the hem of her blanket, not really thinking about anything, attempting to let the depressing thoughts go. Thankfully, within seconds she was thinking about Shane. Mitchie got giddy just thinking about the events of that night. Why wouldn't she? It was an extremely romantic night spent with Shane Gray. Mitchie closed her eyes, hoping to fall asleep with these thoughts in mind. Mitchie'd been paranoid ever since the events of _that _night; Mitchie was mad at herself for letting the happy thoughts slip away. _Shane… _Mitchie thought, trying to make herself think about him, which happened, _Much better. _Shane was absolutely everything to her now. Everything. Yet she couldn't tell him that she – _No! _Mitchie mentally screamed, _what Shane doesn't know won't hurt him._

Mitchie let herself mentally recap what had happened that night.

She slowly fell into a deep sleep with a smile on her face. Shane was with her in her dreams. And just in case you wanted to know, Shane was dreaming about Mitchie that night as well.

There was only one person left awake in that cabin now. That person happened to be Tess; she noticed the way Mitchie looked when she walked in. She knew what had happened that night. She thought about it a little more deeply than she should have, just to keep herself from falling asleep.

Everyone has those nights when they don't want to sleep just because of something that they might dream about. Tess had them especially frequently. She was **terrified** of what she might dream of. She wished she could sleep. But she hated those dreams that kept coming back. She was paranoid of everything. This wasn't her first sleepless night.


	6. Chapter 6

**General POV**

Mitchie woke up gently.

It was odd to Mitchie that Tess was awake at this hour.

"You're awake?" Mitchie asked. She only realized how stupid the question was after it had already been spoken. But she was tired! She just woke up! No one could blame Mitchie. Tess looked at Mitchie who was purposely buried under the covers, not letting anyone see the cuts on her wrist.

"Yes, I am awake. I'm impressed that you figured that out so quickly!" Tess exclaimed sarcastically.

"Sorry," Mitchie groaned, "I'm just tired."

"I know you are. You were out really late last night."

"Yeah…" Mitchie blushed. Tess smirked.

"Well I'll let you know that I'm happy for you and Shane." Tess smiled; Mitchie gave Tess a weird look. "What? I know things!" Tess put up her hands in defense. Mitchie laughed. Mitchie's smile was so bright that Tess could swear that she was lighting up the entire world; Mitchie wasn't quite sure how to react to Tess' statement. So she waited a few moments.

"Yeah… and thanks." Mitchie said. She looked over at the bed beside her, which was Caitlyn's. She was definitely awake. Just not comprehending much of anything. Her green eyes were fixed on the ceiling.

Mitchie didn't know if she should get up or not. Getting up might be tough. Not the _act _of getting up. But covering the scars would be tough.

"There's a spider on the wall." Caitlyn said nonchalantly. Mitchie tried not to burst into laughter. No, she wasn't really good at that. She somehow managed to keep a straight face. Tess was looking at Mitchie and then Caitlyn over and over again, trying to figure out who was weirder.

"Then why don't you kill it?" Tess asked while making her bed. She couldn't stand to be in a messy room. So she was constantly cleaning it. But she didn't fuss about it. Caitlyn stayed silent for a few moments.

"Because I don't feel like getting up." Caitlyn groaned. Tess put the pillow on her bed before walking over to Caitlyn. Mitchie knew what Tess was going to do, so she used this opportunity to put on a grey hoodie so she could join in without anyone questioning the scars.

Anyway, Mitchie watched as Tess pushed Caitlyn off of the bed. "Are you ready to get up now Caitlyn?" Mitchie asked cheerfully.

Caitlyn jerked up before speaking, "I'm definitely awake thanks to Tess; am I getting up in order to kill a spider? No."

"But Cait!" Mitchie whined, "Just kill the spider! I'm more scared of spiders than you are!"

"Oh really? If I were as close to that thing as you are right now I'd be screaming." Caitlyn smirked.

Mitchie looked at the tiny spider, realizing just how scary looking it was. Then she hid behind Caitlyn. "Oh wow, that thing is freaky!"

"Are you serious!?" Tess asked somewhat sarcastically. Mitchie hugged her knees and nodded in a childish manner. "Wow… okay, I dare you both to _try _and kill the spider." Tess smirked.

Mitchie and Caitlyn each took a tissue from the tissue box right beside them and walked toward the spider. Mitchie walked away fairly quickly, laughing about how stupid this was. Caitlyn held out for a little bit longer, but also walked away laughing.

"Let me show you how it's done." Tess said, taking the tissue Caitlyn was holding, folding it in half, and squishing the spider. "The spider is dead." Tess said triumphantly before throwing away the tissue containing the dead spider. Mitchie and Caitlyn looked at each other and burst into laughter. "Okay, this is just a suggestion. How about the two of you both get more sleep tonight, okay?"

**A/N: Hey, I didn't think I would post a chapter tonight, but I got a review that made me want to write more. It was from ****teddybearpixiestix. Anyway, tell me what you thought of this chapter.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Tess' POV**

It felt good to be freed of the 'diva of Camp Rock' title. I felt better without being a jerk and having people fear me. And when me, Caitlyn, and Mitchie got to the cafeteria, it was obvious that someone else had taken that title. "Whoa! Was I really like that!?" I asked, pointing to the new diva.

"Umm… yeah. But at least you changed." Caitlyn answered halfheartedly, I didn't know if she was halfhearted because she didn't want to tell me that I was like that, or because of who the new diva was.

Either way, I felt guilty for torturing Ella, Peggy, Mitchie, and Caitlyn like I did, but strangely, of all the people who _could_ have taken my place, Ella became the new diva.

I watched her and her followers; her followers happened to be newcomers named Zora and Jessie Ray. Neither of them knew any better. I bet they'd been warned against **me **though. I thought it was crazy that Mitchie and Caitlyn, the two people I'd hurt most ended up being my best friends. I decided to look around me to see if there was anything a little less dramatic going on; I noticed that Shane walked in.

Mitchie ran over to him like a little girl would. She quickly placed herself in his arms. He wrapped his strong arms around her, gently.

They were _adorable._

"Hey; miss me?" Shane asked with a chuckle. He was laughing because she was acting cute. Yes, guys were still a mystery to me, but I knew _that. _That's as far as my knowledge of guys goes though.

"Maybe… just a little bit. Okay, maybe a lot. I might have been thinking about you most of the time we've been separated…" Mitchie told him, looking into his warm and inviting brown eyes and smiling. Shane smiled and kissed Mitchie's cheek. She blushed. She'd always been a bit shy. Shane seemed to be calming her overacting nerves.

"I missed you too, Baby." Shane told her. I looked at Caitlyn, who was also smiling because of how cute Shane and Mitchie were acting. I couldn't believe that I ever wanted to take Shane from Mitchie. That was insane, like trying to stop fate. It was wrong to even think you could do something like that.

"They are _so _adorable!" I told Caitlyn, she kept on smiling, looking over at them. I don't know why, but seeing them together made me a bit emotional. It was probably because I was suddenly overwhelmed by the feeling of love. I've only seen hate. I never noticed that there was love all around me, but I had never looked before. That was because I'd never been loved until recently. My mother never wanted me, and my father left when I was six. So my parents never really cared about me, and they most definitely didn't care about each other; I never had **real** friends until this year when I met up with Mitchie and Caitlyn again. And romantic love… that was foreign to me, it was something that only existed in TV shows and books. So seeing romantic love was beautiful to me. I knew that it was probably really weird for me to keep watching them this closely, but I felt that I had a good reason to stare at them for longer than a normal person would.

"Ugh! I wish I could have a guy love me like Shane loves Mitchie! It's probably not ever going to happen to me though." Caitlyn said. Well, Caitlyn and I were both genuinely happy for Mitchie, but we were a little bit jealous. It was completely fine though, we didn't let jealousy get in the way of our friendship; it wasn't like we were going to try and come between them.

What was the point? It wouldn't work anyway. "Don't worry; I'm completely confident that it won't happen to me either. Anyway, I'm going to eat because I'm starving." I said. I walked over to where the food had been laid out for breakfast. I was obviously eating more than I had been last year; I barely ate anything and ended up getting a whole bunch of people to start eating **way **less, just because I was barely eating. Gosh, they were probably skinnier than I was. Anyway, I got some food and sat at a table, waiting for Caitlyn and Mitchie to come and join me. I was joined by Mitchie first, and then by Caitlyn; Caitlyn was really tiny, but she had more on her plate than I did. And Mitchie wasn't eating anything at all. "Mitch, aren't you going to eat something?" I asked her, sounding a bit worried.

"No, I should be losing weight. I'm fat, can't you see that? But don't worry. I ate last night, I'm not starving myself." She said. I looked at her suspiciously, _how could she think she was fat?_ She had the perfect body. She had the body that every girl wished they had. But she sounded convincing.

"M, I'd feel much better if you ate _something._" Mitchie reluctantly took a grape off of my plate. She ate it. I watched her do it. But that was all she took. So that's why I didn't know whether or not to believe a word she had just said. I hadn't seen her eat anything – well, besides one grape – in the last 24 hours.

"There. I ate a grape. And don't worry, I _will _eat lunch, you don't need to be worried about me." Mitchie told me convincingly. She gave me a small smile. I sighed; deciding that I'd at least act like I believed what she had just told me, though telling you I believed her was a complete lie. I looked over at Caitlyn, who seemed to believe Mitchie more than I did, she didn't seem worried at all. So I decided that I was just being paranoid. Besides, paranoia was not something new to me.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Okay, strangely I was listening to 'Crazier' by Taylor Swift while I started writing this… not really the greatest music for the scene… Haha. Anyway, I hope you like the chapter.**

**Caitlyn's POV**

Mitchie actually wasn't lying when she told us that she would eat lunch.

Tess was studying Mitchie extra closely. Mitchie seemed to notice, but she was trying to ignore it, and I didn't understand why Tess was watching her every move. Mitchie was eating. More than we were. "Why do you keep looking at me? You've seen me eat before." Mitchie asked sort of quietly.

I hated being here not knowing exactly what to say. I didn't know what Tess was so paranoid of.

"Sorry. I'm just being overly paranoid. I'm sorry." Tess apologized. I looked at her; the smile that used to be so evident was nowhere to be found. And she seemed unusually quiet.

"It's fine, but… I'm leaving. I have to meet up with Shane, I promised him I'd meet up with him. I don't want to be late." Mitchie said with a smile on her face. Tess' smile came back. It was a good, bright, and happy smile. I thought it was cute that as soon as Mitchie mentioned Shane she lit up, making us happy. "Bye Tess, bye Caitlyn."

I waved, "Bye Mitch."

"Make sure you get Shane to the class on time." Tess said jokingly, but Mitchie and I both knew that there was some seriousness there.

Mitchie left, looking like she was walking on air. In her mind, she was, she was the lucky one of the group. I kept staring into space long after Mitchie was completely out of sight. I wasn't thinking about much of anything; well, it wasn't like it was uncommon; most teenage girls did this. I started thinking about the events of the day, from the spider to Mitchie leaving us just now. Tess snapped her fingers in front of my face; I snapped back into reality. I realized that Mitchie was all that crossed my mind. No, not like _that. _But why Tess was so paranoid was the question that kept crossing my mind. Also, why Mitchie was so secretive was a question that I had, but it wasn't like Tess knew the answer to that.

"Hello? Earth to Caitlyn." Tess said jokingly. I laughed a little before even daring to ask the question that had been on my mind since this morning. I probably didn't want to know the answer. And somehow that made me so much more curious to hear the answer; I know it's weird, but I love hearing things that shock me. I debated on whether or not to ask Tess, but then realized that Tess was one of my best friends. I shouldn't be afraid to ask her. Besides, the question was about Mitchie, who was my other best friend, and Tess cared about her just as much as I did.

"Why are you so paranoid about what's going on with Mitchie?" I asked.

"Because she has strange eating habits. She has less than a bite of food for an entire day and then she completely pigs out… And she looks uncomfortable when her eating habits are mentioned."

I thought about that, it was true, though I didn't think I should be worried...

"True. But at least she's _eating._ But I'm not sure if her eating habits are normal for her or something else…" I added to the conversation. I didn't know whether or not to be freaking out about Mitchie. I was probably making a big deal over nothing, I happened to do that a lot; it wasn't like it was new to me. I was always a bit of a drama queen. Worse than Tess ever was; I know that's hard to believe, but it's true

"I don't either. But I think I should stop worrying." Tess told me before getting up from the table. I could tell that she was simply trying to ignore the fact that she was nervous… I mean I was nervous for Mitchie too, but somehow I was more nervous about how things were going with Shane than her eating habits or why she was so secretive.

I got up as well. I wasn't quite sure exactly what we were going to do, because our first class wasn't until 2, and it was around 1:00 now.

Mitchie always seemed to make things more interesting. But she had a boyfriend now, so I couldn't blame her for wanting to be with him, if I had a boyfriend I'd probably want to be with him every second of the day too.

"So…" I said, knowing that it wasn't really going to make things progress any further if I said that, I just said it so that way we wouldn't be sitting in complete silence. That would be awkward.

Tess sighed. There was absolutely nothing going on without Mitchie. I looked out the window slightly, not really focusing on anything. "Since our first class this year is singing class, we could practice."

"Or… we could talk to new people." I suggested, it wasn't actually a bad idea. It sounded more like a question than a statement though. I couldn't ever figure out things to do when I was around people, I was used to spending my time alone, so I wasn't used to being with people.

**A/N: This would have been out WAY earlier, but ****someone ****decided to chat with me… Luckily she signed out… (Elly, you know I love you!), and then on top of that, I kept spelling things wrong, especially 'Mitchie'. So there, I have an excuse! Not a very good one though…**

**On Thursday night, I went to a Trace Adkins/Martina McBride concert, and I am going to let you know that I died twice that night. Trace Adkins made me dance until I died, and then Martina made me sing extremely loudly until I died. But I loved it anyway. (And lived to tell the story!)**

**Anyway, don't forget to review!**


	9. Chapter 9

**General POV**

Mitchie walked over to the dock, where Shane was. They had promised each other that they'd meet here. It was weird for Mitchie to be feeling this nervous. It wasn't a shocking thing, really, but she thought that she had gotten over her shyness. "Hey Shane, sorry I'm late." Mitchie told Shane softly. Shane got up and hugged her closely. Mitchie liked that Shane was trying to take things slowly, but she wished that she could just kiss him already. She wanted to feel his lips against hers. She'd honestly never had her first kiss yet, but she didn't care. It wasn't necessary in order to live. She was only fifteen; she didn't need to have experienced kissing. Mitchie didn't know why Shane was holding her for longer than anyone else would; Mitchie couldn't say she didn't like it though. That would've been the worst lie in history.

"Actually, you weren't late. I was early." Shane told Mitchie when he finally let go of her; Mitchie blushed and bit her lip. She was really shy, but she knew she was lucky. Luckier than most everyone in the world. And she knew that Shane was going to give her fame whether she wanted it or not.

"Good to know, anyway, what did you want to talk to me about? I've been going crazy all day waiting to find out. It was pure torture!" Mitchie said overdramatically. Shane played along, he didn't know Mitchie as well has he knew he should. But he did know that it was fun to go along with her overdramaticness.

Shane gasped. "I know, I must have _killed _you and then resurrected you and tortured you some more," he said, sounding overly breathy, Mitchie laughed. Shane couldn't help but admire the adorableness of her laugh. It was cute. It sounded quite angelic. But there wasn't a single thing about her that he didn't find cute.

"Yup. Pretty much, I'm still waiting…" Mitchie said impatiently.

Shane seemed to find it fun to 'torture' her. "I'm sorry. Will you forgive me?" Shane looked into Mitchie's eyes with wonder, and it looked like there was nothing that she could say in order to avoid forgiving him. Mitchie gave Shane her 'squinty eyed look'. She did that far too often.

Mitchie sighed in defeat. "Well, when you put it that way…" Mitchie seemed to be saying yes. But she said nothing after that. It was a sentence that she had left hanging. She knew that Shane would make the assumption that she forgave him, so she pretended that she didn't already know. She knew that Shane was purposely annoying her by not telling her to annoy her.

"I'll take that as a yes? Gosh, I'm acting like this is serious. I know you'll forgive me." Shane said, and Mitchie smirked.

"I never said that."

"Yes, but you implied it." Shane told her, and Mitchie had nothing to say after that. It was perfectly fine, the longer she stayed silent, the better the chance was of her and Shane actually talking.

"Okay… maybe I did." Mitchie said. Shane thought her tone of voice was cute; she was so cute when she lost.

"I thought so… anyway… I actually wanted to tell you that my parents want to meet you because I told them about you." Shane said. Mitchie was nervous, as she'd never had a boyfriend and met his parents before.

"Are your parents picky? Will they like me?" Mitchie asked nervously.

"Well, they're picky. But they'll both love you, I know it, they'll love you and adore you just because they know how much I love you, and they'll be happy to know that you're not even close to being like the other girls I've been with."

Mitchie was curious. _What other girls? _"So what's the difference between me and the other girls?"

Shane sighed in a comical way. Mitchie wanted to know why that was his reaction to the question. "They were blondes with an obsession with boys. They freaked out about losing cell phone service and breaking nails. And I dumped them within a few weeks."

Mitchie nodded. "Wow…" Mitchie was glad to be different, "I'm none of the above."

"We're already off to a better start, so don't worry." Shane told her. Mitchie nodded happily. Mitchie had always heard that teen dating was never real because teenagers weren't ever mature enough to date responsibly and weren't planning on marriage. Though Mitchie wasn't sure how 'dating responsibly' was going to go, she had always dreamed about marrying Shane. She had Mitchie Gray written over a lot of her belongings. "And just the fact that you're so sweet and innocent is going to make my mom crazy about me dating you; I'm pretty sure she'll me almost as crazy about the idea as I am." Shane added, looking at his girlfriend adoringly. Mitchie didn't want to break their eye contact. So she kept staring into his gentle and soft eyes; she swore she could fall asleep in them. And sometimes she prayed that she would. "Though being able to match how enthusiastic I am would be crazy."

"Really?"

"Yes. It would be impossible. You're smart, you're funny, you're talented. And it doesn't stop there. But if I listed everything, we'd be here for hours." Mitchie blushed, nervous that Shane was falling for her, not that she didn't want that. Because she did. It was just that she felt that she would never be enough.

"Wow. I never thought I was that amazing."

Shane sighed, not believing that Mitchie was so unconfident. But she was. "Mitchie, amazing is an understatement." Mitchie just didn't understand how Shane always seemed to know exactly what would make her feel better; but somehow he did. And Mitchie loved him for that. It was insane, _Shane _was the amazing one. "And my parents will believe that as well."

Mitchie bit her lip. "If you're _sure._ I'm still going to be nervous about this. It's a normal reaction for me, don't worry. But… when exactly am I going to meet them?"

"Well, they're flying out tomorrow, so anytime after that really." Shane told Mitchie.

"Okay. That's good to know. Hey, shouldn't we be headed to that singing class?" Mitchie asked. "You probably shouldn't be late." Mitchie hated her hoodie at the moment, she was burning up. And it wasn't like taking it off was an option. Well, it was, but she wasn't really in the mood to have to deal with that drama. Shane nodded, responding to Mitchie. Hand in hand, they walked over to the room in which the singing class was being held. At least that's what it was being used for today. Mitchie started blushing, realizing how special she felt with Shane.

They got to the class and many of the people 'awwed' at the sight of Mitchie and Shane together. But there were a few girls giving Mitchie death glares, which she quickly shrugged off. Shane was here, it wasn't like they would kill his girlfriend.

"So this is your first class for the summer and I bet you're all excited about the summer ahead, so who wants to start us off this year?" Most of the hands went up, but one didn't. Shane pointed at her. "You're going first."

"Me?"

"Yes, you. Come on, there aren't that many people here."

The girl walked up in front of the class and started to sing 'This Is Me', the song that she had always remembered from watching the Final Jam the summer before. She was really good too.

"Wow, you're amazing. You're _almost_ as good as Mitchie at singing that." The girl looked over at Mitchie, who looked impressed.

"Really?"

"Yeah, all you need to work on now is confidence."


	10. Chapter 10

**Mitchie's POV**

After the singing class I ate a little more, not much though, because I knew full well that I would feel guilty afterward. I only let myself eat because I had to make the people around me believe that I was perfectly healthy. I walked over to the empty cabin, it was never this quiet with us three girls here, but the silence was perfect.

I made my way inside, knowing I would be alone. I walked into the bathroom and dropped to my knees over the toilet. I stuck a finger down my throat, forcing myself to vomit. I finally felt that feeling that I hated. It was so gross. But I had no choice but to do this, not if I **ever **wanted to lose weight. I finally started to throw up; I felt like I was coughing up everything that had been in my stomach. I felt so much better after I finished and could finally breathe normally.

I flushed the toilet and looked at myself in the mirror.

My face was pale and I looked very weak. I was **not **weak. I hated thinking that I was. I quickly brushed my teeth to get rid of the stupid and gross taste that was left in my mouth.

I tried to hide any trace that I ever broke down in here; the last thing I wanted was for people to find out what was really going on in my life.

I walked out of the bathroom to take that tiny item out of my song book. I knew the blade was getting dull, so I would have to press down harder in order to get the same effect that a tiny cut used to give me. I walked back into the bathroom, closing the door and locking it. I pulled up my left sleeve and cut my wrist right over the spot where the cuts were fading, although, at that point, some of them were actually **scarring**. It stung like crazy, only because I'm usually entirely disassociated when I cut. But not this time.

I felt tears roll down my face; I knew that I now had black tear-stains across my face. It smudged my dark make-up. That was the _one_ down-side of wearing all this black eye-liner.

I got up off of the floor. I fixed my make-up in order to make it look like I had not been crying in here. It was weird doing this, while completely ignoring the fact that I was bleeding, because telling you that bleeding was something I disliked was a lie. I loved it; I couldn't tell you why I did though. It just didn't make sense that I wasn't watching the blood creep up onto my skin.

I just loved the pain, I loved being able to see the effects of my self-destructive behavior, though really, my self-destruction had more to do with other people than I was actually comfortable with. I wanted it to be all _my_ fault.

I pulled my left sleeve back down over my wrist after I had stopped bleeding and my body had begun to heal itself once again. I needed to get out of here before I did something I would regret. I put my razor blade back into my song book, and left the song book on my bed. I walked out of the cabin. I was feeling extremely stressed for no real reason. I didn't want anyone to know about that though. I walked around to wherever people might be. Like in the cafeteria… where Ella was making out with some guy I'd never seen before. I assumed that guy was her boyfriend; at least I _hoped _he was. But people these days were getting crazier and crazier. Besides, I have a boyfriend and I haven't even had my first kiss yet. I didn't mind it so much though, I mean kissing was something I wanted to have happen to me, but it wasn't the most important thing to me; I looked around for something that didn't make me so jealous, like a group of girls that were glaring at me, they thought they wanted to be me, but if they spent a day as me, they'd hate life as much as I do; though life does have its perks, like being able to smile, and making other people happy. That's what I lived for. I wanted to be the girl who made everyone happy, not the girl who only made herself happy like so many people in the world are.

"Mitchie!" I heard a squeal from behind me. It was Peggy, one of Tess' ex-followers, my friend – and the winner of Final Jam – last summer. I squealed and hugged her. She seemed a bit surprised to see me like this. But I'm pretty sure she was seeing nothing more than this new style. It was completely different, but she treated it as if it was unimportant, because it was.

"Oh my gosh! Peggy, how have you been?" I asked her. I looked her over, and strangely, she looked exactly the same, but I couldn't have expected her to change that much. No one could have compared to how much _I_ changed.

"I've been great, how about you?" She asked me over-excitedly.

"I've been alright; I've been feeling good since Shane finally asked me to be his girlfriend."

"So that's why all the girls at camp are plotting to kill you…" Peggy said, totally getting it.

"Yeah…" I said, "wait, what!?"

Peggy burst out laughing. "It's kinda funny that they're threatened by you because you're dating Shane."

I smiled too. "Wow…"

"They all wanna be you Mitchie."

"What!? Why would anyone want to be like me!?" I asked.


End file.
